PLAYING happy families made former Packed To The Rafters favourite Jessica Marais an international star.
But in an emotional TV confession, the 26-year-old has spoken for the first time about the childhood trauma of watching her own father drop dead, The Daily Telegraph reported.
It was Valentine's Day and university dean Tony Marais had just moved his wife and young brood from South Africa to a new life in Australia.
Six months into the adventure, the devoted dad was returning home from a family picnic, where he'd complained of "tingling sensations" in his arms. Marais, then aged 9, and her younger sister Clara watched in horror as their father collapsed and died from a heart attack.
It's a memory the Logie-winner says she "relives every day". Still pained by the experience, the star of new US drama, Magic City opens up on Seven's Sunday Night this weekend.
"He collapsed very suddenly and, yeah, my sister and I were both present," the actor said.
"It's sort of something you relive I think, everyone that has lost someone ... you relive it every day. It feels fresh but obviously time does heal a lot of wounds and I'm definitely much better at coping with it now."
The tragedy "marooned" the grieving family left behind in Perth, where Marais said her mother Karen "pulled us through a very hard time".
Now engaged to her Rafters co-star James Stewart, she admits she fears losing her loved ones the same way as her dad.
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